Essay: My reality.

5.09.2010
I finally understand what is meant by: "Anya, take off rose-colored glasses" or," When you will grow up?" Did I behave incorrectly? Many times I have asked myself this question....
I understand, I understand everything and everybody, and who would understand me. I'm not serious, moody... My dreams are only the dreams of a teenager in whom is raging youthful maximalism. Those, that they see around. I can give a money in the debt and to forget for it, it seems to me that I still will pluck a big jackpot, and magnificent success is waiting for me in my life. Great job, lots of money, I will be able to afford everything, countless admirers... That is all I will have, and the time inevitably runs forward and is only a question when? We all are waiting for the inexplicable miracle...
Sometimes I sit and I just know that I'm not ready for my future...
I always wanted to live in Moscow. This city is for me as my soul, though I have never been there, I do not know anything about it, but I know that this is my city! From one its name it intercepts my breath and aches in my chest. When I imagine Moscow, I can smell the city by the cars gas pollution. Center, always in traffic, nervous drivers, always rushing somewhere pedestrians, and of course the evening lights, Red Square... waxed cars, expensive dressed men and shining women...
I know that life, boiling inside the city is for me! I always dreamed about it, to be there, in the spotlight of this city!
While I realize that dreams rarely come true, or come true, but only when we do not need this... But even despite this, I want to believe that this "rare" will occurs with me. And with this faith I live for several years. There was not even one day that I did not think about my dream, realizing that the distance is blame for everything, my dream and faith become the goal and moves me only ahead!
Sometimes I think that if my Moscow was located across the street from my house, I still would not have been ready for it at this stage of my life... It would seem that its here - take it, but even so, my city would have remained out of reach for me.
I know what we need for the last, crucial step. All the matter in the mental balance of faith, faith in yourself, your dream, understanding your goals and readiness for their implementation. I believe that my goal approaching me, and I am rapidly moving to it!
Each person is given a test before give him, what he wants... A person needs only to dare and go to meet his dream, stepping over his fears and feelings, that its just may not be possible, if you are ready then go forward, take the prize, but if not ready, you'll step on your dreams and your fears will quietly, slowly, but surely eat your dream... breaking your confidence and your will!
Believe in yourself, the world loves strong people! And I believe, believe. that I can do everything, and I will ask God that he give me more tests and I will pass them all. We all know that we are given only those test, which can be overcome.
Step by step, I'm doing what I need. I believe that everything is not by chance. The case is the just thread of a large tangle, which is called life. Even match lying on the road, which you saw is not an accident. The other will not even notice it.
And you go, and notice, look directly into the eyes of the world, walk with head held high and know that in spite of everything, there ahead is your dream and it have been waiting for you...

7.01.2011
Already a month, as I live in Moscow! I can not describe the feelings that now embrace me, I'm happy to tears! People believe in yourselves, let everything come true in those who know what he lives for and goes to his intended goal!